From Failure To Fighter – Keto and Mental Health

Let’s talk mental health.

My emotions and mental well-being has been very up and down since, well…. I gained all my weight to the scale tipping weight of 210 right before I gave birth to Maddox.

Post-Partum Anxiety.

Depression.

Anxiety.

I hated myself. I felt a heart wrenching pain when I would try to find something flattering to wear for my husband, only to end up on the floor in my closet crying or cursing at myself. Nothing fit. I couldn’t button my jeans. I was still wearing maternity pants 7 months after I had Maddox weight at 204 around Christmas. I avoided photos with my family or would get mad at photos my husband took of me candidly with our kids. It seemed impossibly to break the cycle of emotional warfare I placed upon myself for so long.

My anger and frustration would spike and I found myself getting upset over nothing or lashing out my insecurities on my husband, who frankly, never deserved that…. not once.

I would question to myself, “How could my children love me when I am such a failure? How could they ever be proud to stand by me in public when I can’t even look at my own self?” Etc.

My daughter, 6, was my guiding light. That unconditional love… she knew when I was hurting, as she would hold my face and tell me that I am the best mommy in the world. I never wanted for my 6 year old to have to pick me up… that should be my job as it relates to her.

We’ve been through a lot together. Her emotional maturity and compassion is like nothing I have ever seen. She is… and has been… my reason to get back up and never quit.

When I started the Ketogenic Diet, I had no clue what the hell I was doing… some days I still feel that way. I had to completely shut down my bad eating habits and learn to calm down…. slow down.

I started to feel crappy with some KetoFlu symptoms, but in a way… it helped me not think about all the emotional pain.

As time went on, I started getting into a steady routine and felt a difference mentally and emotionally. I wasn’t so quick to anger. I hadn’t recalled the last time I cried. I felt emotionally lighter and a smile started to rest upon my face on a regular basis. I had mental clarity in a way that I began to wonder if I could start to consider backing down/off certain medications.

I felt good. I was dressing up more, taking time on my hair, taking more pride in my appearance. I am beginning to see and feel like the Meagan I have always been and have been searching for, for so long.

Do I contribute these positive strides in my mental health and emotional strength to this Ketogenic Lifestyle change, YES. I’m eating more clean and I’m not looking to food for comfort when I am at my low emotional points. I also have been saying positive things to myself each day…. what I know I am worth. That I am worthy. I am enough. I have always been enough…

I have been trying to inspire and motivate others… including my family, friends, coworkers and even complete strangers. I find that positivity is contagious ….. so is negativity. I was drowning in my own depression and anxiety that I couldn’t swim out of it…. until I hit my breaking point and decided I was done feeling sorry for myself. I was tired of making excuses and depriving myself of so many opportunities that I had let pass me by.

I’m a survivor. I’m a fighter. I am enough.

Has the Ketogenic Diet helped you emotionally and/or mentally? Have you experienced change in how you respond to your environment and social surrounding… or even when you are by yourself?

Please share, if you’d like.

Thank you for allowing me to continue to share my experiences and journey with you all.

KETOcop

A little late

So here is my 4 month photo! Proof that you can still see a difference even if the scale isn’t moving.

Stay hopeful and stay determined! Just because the numbers are at a stand-still doesn’t mean your body is.

This was taken around my 4 month anniversary… (July 15 is my official milestone date)

Aunt Flo-Yo

Ladies…. you know where I’m going with this. The unwelcome guest who makes their rounds each month for an undetermined amount to time. Yes, it is the one and only Aunt Flo. Dun Dun Dunnnn.

I’ve noticed since I have started losing weight on the Ketogenic Diet that my periods have changed… quite a bit. Before, I would have periods that lasted up to 2 week, super heavy, or even sporadic. This was even while on Birth Control, which was suppose to regulate me as well as lighten my flow. I haven’t suffered from cramps since before my first child, so I count my blessings where there may be. Lets flash forward to how Aunt Flo is effecting my personal space. My periods have become more regular and are much lighter, for once. Even the duration of her visit has shortened… so much so, I am skeptic.

Other changes include, less bloating, less weight gain, less moodiness and irrationality, better bounce back, no acne outbreaks, less energy lost and less sugar cravings.

Some of these changes are huge for me. Every month I would always cave and eat a couple cookies… Chips Ahoy Candy Blast to be exact. Yeahhhh…. I don’t know why I even crave them… I never really ate them before I gave birth to Maddox. I am not even a big cookie person… or sweets. I was always the one that would bake sweets, never to eat them.

Typically, I have gained weight during my menstrual period, only to lose it once the bloating and cycle has ended. This month, I’ve gained 0… but also lost 0. This is a positive change for me in the sense that, in theory, I have been losing and retaining to break even…. or I have not been losing, but have also not been retaining that fluid and bloated weight. Either way… however you look at it, it is a positive change.

Ladies, how has your Aunt Flo visits changed, if any? Positive and/or Negative.

Stay strong. Stay Classy.

You are beautiful.

KETOcop

Endocrinologist

Well, the day finally came where I was up to bat for my Endocrinologist appointment. After waiting MONTHS for my initial appointment, it was finally here. My Doctor was very nice and personable. I expressed to her what syptoms, issues and concerns I had with my overall health. I also advised her that I had started the Ketogenic Diet around the same time I made the appointment to see her. She had nothing negative to say about my choice of diet, as I expressed to her that I was attempting to also burn the candle at both ends by turning my nutrition around pending the appointment with her. I really loved how receptive she was.

We agreed that I should get labwork done, to see what, if anything, would be shown or pinpointed. Is there something going on with my thyroid? Is it my estrogen levels? My stress hormone? Is it my birth control messing with my hormones? Do I have a vitamin D deficiency? Too much vitamin A? Am I going through early menapause? The questions are endless…. but there is no sense in stressing and causing anxiety over something I have no control over at the moment.

The next day I took a type of steroid the night before my labs. I also had to fast, which was ok… as I am used to random and intermittent fasting.

The morning of the lab came! I should be used to being stuck with needles by now, as I had to submit blood samples when I was high-risk with my pregnancy, post-miscarriage, etc. AND let me clear the air on this…. getting TATTOOS are totally DIFFERENT than having a huge needle get stuck in your vein! NOT FUN… bloodwork that is…. TATTOOS…. those are welcomed. ha!

When I completed my labs, they advised me that it would likely take about a week or two for the results to come in and the Doctor would call me/ make contact at that time. So, here I am…. waiting… waiting… and waiting some more…. I hope that there is nothing concerning or wrong with me…. but I also hope that there is, so it would explain all this weight. I am 32. before I had my daughter over 6 years ago, I weighed 135 lbs. pre-baby. After the birth of my son, 1, I was up to 204 lbs. I had gestational diabetes with BOTH pregnancies. I miscarried before I was preganant with my baby boy, however I was only about 7-8 weeks pregnant when that occurred… I was not far enough along to know if I would have gotten gestational diabetes with that pregnancy.

I am always praying for the best… but I also need to plan for the worst.

I am thankful for such a nice and receptive Doctor. I look forward to hearing from her in the near future.

KETOcop

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or on Instagram: ketocop

xo